A long-lived assistant that brings up memories without being asked must decide at every turn whether anything in its store is worth an interruption. We show that this decision is a multiple-testing problem whose difficulty grows with the store size N. On streaming replays of LongMemEval, a similarity threshold tuned to 5% false alarms at N=8 reaches 84-100% at N=2048 across embedding models and cue types, and LoCoMo and LLM judges show it too.
We prove that a gate which thresholds the best of N independent irrelevant scores at false-alarm rate alpha operates at a per-item false-positive rate of about -ln(1-alpha)/N, which pins its hit rate to the far left of the single-comparison ROC curve and, under regular variation, makes it regularly varying in N. A finite-pool form of this bound predicts the hit rate of a label-tuned threshold on held-out questions to within 6.1 points. At matched false alarms the deployed score recalls 14-26 points more than raw cosine.
A cue-swap conformal gate, which ranks the current cue among other cues on the same store, has a finite-sample false-alarm guarantee under exchangeability. With a background drawn from the user's unfiltered history it keeps false alarms at 3-6% on LongMemEval at the hit rate of a label-tuned threshold; on LoCoMo it overshoots or turns conservative depending on where its reference cues come from. In a chronological replay with the user's own earlier messages as references, it speaks on 6-8% of session-opening turns, against 57% for the deployed gate at N=2048, at about 50 ms per decision on one CPU thread.
A cross-encoder reranker pays the same price of scale, and on a prospective-memory benchmark, similarity gates recall at most 9% of constraints at controlled false alarms. One human and two LLM annotators judge most false alarms unhelpful for a response.
Code and data: https://github.com/RiverChenStillCompiling/price-of-scale